Choice

how many pregnant women choose abortion everyday and how many change their mind right before they abort?. How many change their mind and give birth successfully? What are the chances of these random choices turning out to be something significant to their lives or to the whole world?. I know one woman who was ready for the abortion and finally changed her mind..The result of her choice?- Hitler was born. Who controls our choices...If it is controlled by factors that's beyond us, is it right to call it a "choice"?. Judas's kiss was prophesized a millenium before Judas was born. Who decided he's gonna kiss?. Judas? or someone who prophesized ? or The God who decided this to happen?. So, where is Judas now?. in hell?. because he made a wrong choice?. Why am I talking about all this...? and why are you even reading this?..

Imperfect? - Perfect!

you are all flaws...so full of imperfections..far from anything pleasing.so, you cover yourself with those bright colorful clothes.some red..some blue...and you make sure you leave nothing uncovered..you put on that leather jacket...shining tan brown.you think it's perfect..now the world can't see you..and that to you, is deep comfort..and then one night you wake up from your troubled self..How long are you gonna duck from the world's eyes?...what are you afraid of losing?..Unpleasant questions seem to be springing from some where deep within and you don't know how to fix it..you decide.. realize you are gonna cut loose.you are tired of hiding in..you wanna confront the world and reveal that you are ugly, deep inside..and that you are not intimidated by the fear ..you build the courage standing naked with world's eyes on you..you are ready to be spat on..to be an object of contempt..a substance of obstinence and just then when you have stripped down completely with tears waiting roll down from your eyes, you realize something's not what you thought it was ...that there is beauty in your scar ..the charm in your imperfection .there is a life under the jacket..and you don't have to distract the world from it..indulge.

pleasure of losing..

I'm at the center of this world on my red leather couch watching all the people run like nuts around me..there must be a reason I thought.asked a dozen of them but they had no time to explain what this mad run is for..they seem playing some strange game..some of these guys are watching me like I'm doing something wrong..like I'm gonna miss out..like I am some loser ..They all seem to be running faster at every breath..I sense their fear of being left out..I slip back on my couch pampering and sipping some wine and it dawns on me that there is a peace in knowing you don't have to run..that you don't have to slog hard to fill your life..that there is a beauty in keeping the jar clean..and that only takes you to sit back and cherish the moment..that you are better off the track and let others trample each other for the prize that's not worth it.that you can just let life take it's course..why fight for the place that doesn't exist?..why try to prove a point when none exists?..when the world comes asking why you are not in the rally..and calls you a loser..I feel the urge to be courteous and spend a minute to ask "SO FUCKIN WHAT?"..

An illusion called "Love"

93% of all things happening in every one's life is because of Love. Your love, your son's love , your daughter's love, your husband's love for another woman, your wife's love for another man and someone's love for someone else ..all movies, all poetry..most writings are inspired by love..wars have been fought..million lives risked to save one relationship..it's insane, yet sane..It's illogical yet has a logic of it's own..It's wiling to sacrifice everyone around..your dad, mom, friends, money, even life but yet can't sacrifice itself. It's like an invisible score of cocaine injected when your pair of eyes meets hers' literally. The neuro-chemical patterns of a guy who's in love is the same as that of the one who's scored coke.

now, why I am talking about Love, well..not because I'm experiencing this unique high . though I don't mind to get hit to see why it's worth a Taj Mahal or Troy. ..so what if it's Love?. it's just the trigger of a chemical reaction by pheremones and oxytocins that kicks your butt high in the air and makes you think this whole experience is divine and out of the world..yet they are chemical response to your biological needs to bond and reproduce.

SO fuckin what!!?

Life's running faster than light..cutting every second and packing them into packets of "past"... I'll be older than now when I complete this blog.you'll be older than now the moment you cross this line..I'm worried about people worrying that I am not worrying about what I should worry about..cutting the crap, no one gathers everything on the run.. I left some and picked some.. you picked them but left some..so, what if I dont have what you have and you don't what I have. .seriously... so, fuckin what??!!

why do we all run so hard..why do we gather all things that we gather..when there is no finish line..when we are all sucked from the field abruptly like an insect sucked by my vacuum cleaner..what's my reward if I gather more or gathered less?

Let me begin with a clean slate...let me ask again, SO FUCKIN WHAT?!